(upbeat music) - So sometimes that failure can move you into such an amazing place and space that you didn't even know was possible for you. Which leads me to number two, dream big. Change happens in huge dreams. And when you allow yourself to actually step into those dreams, that's when massive changes occur. Welcome, I'm Peter Williams, and for the past 10 years, I've been connecting with thousands of people from the stage and online to help them discover the importance of spiritual and energetic practices so they can thrive with confidence, clarity, and purpose. It is time to awaken your connection, align with your soul, and achieve your own inner power right here on the Inner Power Podcast. (upbeat music) So welcome back, we're joined again by the awesome Nick Demos, and I tell you what, I don't think I've ever ended an episode on such a cliffhanger, and I couldn't help, I got off recording from part one, and I said to Nick, "You nailed it, what perfect choreography!" (laughing) - Well, you know, it's like when you watch a Netflix show, you know what I mean? Like one of those like "Docu" series type thing, and it's like, content, content, content. Cliffhanger! - To get you to like continue on, to continue, to get you to binge, so I hope you're binging this. - Look, if I have you as I not bingeing from this, I'll tell you what, they're not residing with my podcast at all, so I might be in a greater world of hurt, but honestly, what an absolute story, like, and I think it really, I don't know how well, personally, I'm a little bit lost for words here in the story, 'cause this is the first time I've actually, she had this story with me, and it's like an honor to hear it, but to obviously now sit here and talk about it, and to say for yourself, like you were saying, at the epitome of the, or the highlight of, you know, that career path, so to speak, and you're there, and number one, you're thinking about investors first and forth, like, oh, wow, like, okay, they're gonna get some money back. And then number two, you're talking about walking up on stage, collecting this awesome award, and it's a, you know, a recognition and a dedication to all the hard work that you've put in, and yet you're saying you're having this out-of-body experience. And so after this, you're saying how, like, now the real work began. This is when you really had to dig deep, so we're really looking forward to hearing more about this, so can you walk us through? So you're saying this had to change again, obviously, so where did this lead you? What kind of work were you jumping into after this? - Yeah, so that really led to the biggest change of my life, which was diving in with the therapist and digging through the trauma, the years of abuse that I experienced in childhood, the feeling of not being seen by my family, the feeling of being a little gay boy who grew up in rural Montana, USA, and really having to dive through that, dive into that, not through it, really dive into it so I could get through it. I also dove even further into my yoga journey. I went and studied much deeper. I sat with a teacher. I even lived with him for a bit. I really dove into the practices. And what that did for me of really diving into, who am I? Who am I really? Who am I without all of these, without the award, without the achievement, without the validation? How do I self validate? How do I turn it inward and really understand myself at a level at which I didn't at that time? And so it was several years, but what came out of that was newfound creativity, a deeper sense of story, a deeper sense of belonging to all things, not just that which was achievement, to the oneness of humanity. And from there, I began to create these documentaries that I wouldn't have done otherwise. I was very single theater focused. I began to create more stories of the human spirit and diving into people's stories in a much deeper way of interviewing people like you're doing of, I just built this well of new energy that was from in out versus outside in. - Oh, love that. - And through that, something needed to shift. My business partnership in the theater shifted and that began to dissipate because I was changing. And I wasn't changing actually. I said I was changing, but I wasn't changing. I was stepping more into who I actually was fully. And when that happens, vibrationally, things begin to fall away, relationships shift because as you evolve, some people are gonna evolve with you and some people are going to begin to shed and fall away. And it was natural. It wasn't a, oh, we have to break up. It wasn't like that at all. It was simply that I was shifting. And so therefore, so did the relationships. I began to have this real sense of needing to serve in a different way, in a more profound, deeper way, more directly with people one-on-one. Because one of the things about theater or the entertainment is that you are affecting people. These stories that you tell definitely affect people. There's no question about it. They can shift minds, they can shift hearts, but I felt this calling now, because I was listening, to do some one-on-one work with people, to work in a group, to create community. And so that really is what led me to the online space. A friend of mine said, "I think you need an online business." I said, "I have no idea what you're talking about. I can barely turn on my computer." - That is, I have to admit, coming from that background Antonio Awards and going through it and they go, "You need an online business." It is a little, it's a hard one to follow, isn't it? It's a little bit of-- - She just was, she was an intuitive and she just had this sense that this was my next step. And again, a bit like the, you know-- - Going from a bay head to a theater, a manager of a theater, a director. - Yeah. It was a bit like, what is this journey that I'm on? How come it's not linear like everybody else? I did go through a bit of that, right? - Oh, okay. - Oh, but this is actually the creative life. This is the spiral. And if you're listening, you follow, rather than it being about my ego or where I needed it to go. And so I then listened to that calling and found a mentor and began to come on to this online world, this entrepreneurial crazy space, Peter, that I met you at, thank you. - Yeah, and finding that. I just hear that like, wow, like jumping into it. And it's just out of curiosity now, like, you know, following that, and let's just clarify for our listeners and music. So it is like, we've gone from dancer and bear head doing Russian jumps, lacking and struggling to find our spot on Christmas day. And then come to a theater in Florida for winter, which is like, yay. And then eight years later in that space, you know, doing that, collecting awards, doing your own production back on Broadway. And then big shift, massive. Sounds like a very, I don't know how to describe it, it's very personal journey. And it's like, obviously you're a lot of healing, a lot of discovery, a lot of, you know, truth and a lot of coming back into yourself and resonate with what's right for you. So B suggested to go into the online space. So just out of curiosity for our listeners, how do you, what in the online space exactly, does it mean that you think about like this train of thought or this, your, I can't say line, 'cause it's a little bit of a squiggly one, but that's perfectly fine. So what is it in the online space that kind of drew you? What was your first initial thought or what were you kind of discovering there? - Well, I had been teaching yoga. After I studied deeply, I taught for many years and I even taught in teacher training programs across the world and, you know, in Guatemala and Costa Rica and UK. And, you know, so I had already been a teacher of sorts. And I thought when I came into the, to the online space, I was going to teach meditation and I was going to teach yogic philosophy. And that's where I came in thinking I was going to do. That was the entire first year, well, six months until people kept saying to me, how did you build this business so fast? What are you doing? And this was before 2020, right before 2020, it was 2019. And so I began giving people classes on how to do it because that's what people were asking of me. And then that sort of expanded and grew from there consequently. Because yes, my business did build fairly quickly in the online space because I had all of those business skills coming in. Because I also had built not a huge following but following enough that people were willing to pay me to teach them. And that combination of those things then led me to then be the teacher of teachers, which is what I was doing in yoga. So it's always been sort of that, you know, that way. And get this, one of the things I most love about the online space is it's full circle for me. You know why? I get to dance on reels. (laughing) Now I don't have a bare head. Maybe I'm gonna get a bare head. I was gonna say, I'll get you up for Christmas. (laughing) Just to really make sure it is full circle, we'll get a bare head. It's like, even if I get a yogi be bare face mask, that'll be enough just to do it. So, oh, that's hilarious, but. (laughing) It's, don't you love that? It's like, tick, like, you know, I can dance the way I wanna dance without the bare head. What have we got? - Well, one of the things about the online space that I absolutely love that is related to that is that it is bringing together all of these pieces, all of that story that we just went through in part one, if you haven't listened. And part two is that it brings it all together. And I get to create organically and authentically, and I get to teach and I get to share, and I get to talk on stages, and I get, you know what I'm saying? Like, it's just this natural fit. Now there are things that I don't like. I'll be very, very blunt and clear about that. (laughing) There are things I don't care for. You know, there's some minutia stuff, you know, and building a team, which I'm great at building a team. Like, there's good stuff. There's more good than there is the crap that I don't like, the minutia. I don't know if you feel that way. Do you feel that way? Do you feel like everything brought you here? - It's like, I always do every, and that's the big thing, I was actually gonna bring you into that because it is, it's a very valid point that a lot of people start thinking like, I think people, and your story is again, a beautiful example of this, is I find so many people are afraid to try something so new or left field for the reason that they feel that they're gonna lose a part of their identity, or they're going to waste some of their past knowledge or experience, but you know, your story, 100%, it just shows you that, no, no, no, it's just all adding up, and it's all helping you to lead you all the way back to dancing back on Instagram reels. So, you know. (laughing) - Full circle. - Full circle. But it is, but it's like, and look where it is now. And I wanted to quickly touch on, if you don't mind, about the difference because, you know, even just hearing you talk about that, and you can just tell like, I love the passion, I love the enthusiasm that comes out of, and hearing in your voice when you're talking about, you get to create, and like, you know, it's authentic, you know, these are very, very powerful words, and it's even more powerful because, you know, 100%, you know, you can feel it, you can hear it in your voice, that's what I love the most. But it's interesting, like, talking about that, can you possibly describe the difference? Like you were saying beforehand, you said it was driven, whereas like, and then after doing that in a work, and kind of coming out here now, you say it's more authentic. I know that's a bit of a deep one, it might be a little bit philosophical, I'm putting you on the spot, but it's like, can you possibly describe that for people? Because I think that's a really important difference to try and help people to understand if we can. So ultimately for me, it's energetic, this is an energetic experience. When I am out of alignment, and working from more of that egoic place, it's harder. It feels harder, it feels pushed, it feels at times difficult, it feels out of, again, out of body almost. And when it is authentic and alignment, it feels easy and joyous. I can always tell by the level of my joy, where I'm at. It's like a scale for me, where am I at a one today, am I joy or am I at a 10? If I'm at my 10, then I'm in my, I'm at my ultimate zone. And so because not everything you do, right, that you create is going to feel like a 10 all the time. That's not what I'm saying. But I know if I'm tipping the scale below that five, I'm pushing, I'm not coming from a place of truth versus when I'm on the other side of the scale. And like you said, the passion, I can feel, you can feel it, the passion, the joy. That's the difference for me. - I think that's a great way of looking at going, scale of 110. And I think I love that honesty there, going, "Hey guys, it's not gonna be a 10 every day." Because it's like, you know, look, we all still have to suffer some of the good old reality side of things and, you know, paperwork and all that kind of crap. And, you know. - And entrepreneurship, as you and I both know and have discussed is a bit of a roller coaster. There are days that it feels great and there are days that it's rough 'cause you are creating and creation in its very nature is chaotic. It's not smooth. - No, well, you know, hence, like, you know, what the universe was created with the big bang, I don't think that was it. - Exactly. I don't think it was smooth. - I can't imagine someone playing the harp and say, "Yes, let the planets and stars be created." (laughing) You know, it'd be nice, maybe. You never know, in an alternate reality, maybe, but. - Maybe. - But it is, like, you know, 100% it's a very, entrepreneurship exactly is up and down, but it's kind of working with it. But I like always say to people too, which I can relate to is like, the one thing I love about the entrepreneurship, which is a double-edged sword, and I don't get me wrong, is that, like you said, you come from that space, you can create how you want and away you go. But I always find, of course, some things are great, some things are not so great. Let it be known, people, like, you know, it's one of those things, like, even still now, like, even though I've been on tour for 10 years, yes, I can sit and stand and speak in front of an audience of 300 plus, and yet I go to a different place and I'm lucky to have 40 people in front of me, but that's just the way it is, and you just, that's part of it, you know? And the whole thing is you just go with those motions, you can't help that. But I do love the fact, because for me, and a part of that is, if something does start to shift a change, I feel the freedom, in a sense, of being able to adapt to that, rather than, you know, how like, you know, I don't know whether you've found it in your theater days, or even like, you're usually, how you're gonna go, "Oh, you gotta really push through this, "doesn't matter what happens," because you have obligations, or you go, you owe to the people and stuff like that, like, it gets, can be a bit arduous. - Yeah, I think one of the advantages of that early life, as an actor and as a dancer, and as a creative of any kind, or all the kinds that I did, is that you have to be adaptable. It's a learned behavior, and the more you do it, the better at it you get. I think when I was really young, it was easier, because as I said, I didn't have anything tying me. I didn't have the responsibilities. As you get older, you have a bit more knowledge, and a bit more ties, a few more ties, and so it can seem more difficult almost to make changes, to make those changes, which is slightly different than adaptability. I think of change as a choice, and adaptability is what's come to you, and how do you respond to it? - That is powerful too, like, change is a choice. And again, I think your story exemplifies that, like, you know, that moment of receiving that award, and having that ad-aboid experience going, "I need to do this work." You made the choice to go, "Right, "and I'm gonna make a change here, "because as much as this is wonderful, "but this is not how it's supposed to be." - And sometimes changes aren't necessarily a choice. It's given to us, right? If you suddenly have cancer, or you suddenly, you know, that's not a choice, right? But it's a change. So some are given, and that's where adaptability comes in, versus making the choice change. And I like to think that it is both. And I'd like, you know, of course, if those changes, like, I've had changes that have been given to me, and that was, you know, of course, that was the Japan earthquake, and whatever else, I didn't have much of a choice in that one, but I still had to make the choices around stay, you know, stay in Japan, stay in that town, change countries, whatever else. You know, there's always, there's other choices that flow on from that. You know, it's a bit of a cause and effect really kind of comes to it. But I think it's a powerful thing to recognize that. So change and adaptability are a big thing. But, you know, I love hearing that. I think what a wonderful journey kind of, you know, making your way through all of that. And I love that. I love how you're like, it's like, oh, okay, you want me to tell, you want me to tell you how to do it. Okay, I'll tell you how to do it. I love how I just like, okay, like, you just so love that. Just like, cool, let's go with that. It's so nice, go with the flow. - I, well, I just realized that that's what they, what people wanted. And who, I have to step out of the way, and be that channel, rather than me saying, no, that's not the flow, that's not the way. (laughing) - Oh, seriously, we're going to have to band together and do a live speaking gig. I can imagine how much fun we could really have. - I would love that. I would absolutely love that. - Oh, look, see, it's on my radar. I'm telling you, it's going to happen. See, I'm like that, I'm like, no, it's there. It's like, oh, this is going to be done. - Put it out there. - Oh, massively. - Put it out there, it's done. - Absolutely massively. But just to have you look at it and like kind of to sum up this because what a beautiful journey where you're at and not being afraid of change. But if you could list three big things that, you know, the lessons that you've really got out of your journey so far, what would they be? - Hmm, good question. - Boom. - Three big. - Surprise choreograph, you know. Do not put that in script for Mickey. (laughing) - The three big ones, don't be afraid to fail. Because I think that what holds people back from changing is their fear around failure. And the truth of the matter is that you're going to fail. And failure can be the best thing that happens to you. Some of those, if I hadn't failed when I wrote that musical that fell apart, the documentary that I'm now doing probably wouldn't have happened because I would have been only doing those musicals, right? So sometimes that failure can move you into such an amazing place and space that you didn't even know was possible for you. Which leads me to number two, dream big. Change happens in huge dreams. And when you allow yourself to actually step into those dreams, that's when massive changes occur. And again, in ways that you can't even currently maybe fully imagine. You just have to be open to the idea that they can, but they can. - Number three, drum roll please. - Number three, wisdom about change. Let's see. As I look back on my life, I said, don't be afraid of failure. I said, what's the second thing I said? (laughing) - No, so, you know how like, you talk and you go into it and then you don't, it's not even you anymore. And then you're like, oh, I forgot that already. - I look, I 100% know what that feeling is like. - Yeah, that is, yeah. - I was so, I was so wrapped up. I think I was, I was prompting and thinking, do I dig deeper here with the don't be afraid point? (laughing) - Dream big was number two. - Yeah, dream big was number two. - Yeah, and I think the other thing that I've really learned on this path is to go within first. If you can, turn inward first to go outward. I used to try to do everything from the outside in. I don't know if that's an old acting school thing. Like the old British acting school is outside in. American acting school is inside out. I don't know what Australia is. You'll have to tell me. - We're probably a blend of the two. - Yeah, you probably are. That would make sense. - Just look at Hugh Jackman or Heath Ledger in the day. Kate Blanchett. - Yeah, yeah. I need to interview them. That's on my bucket list, right? But turn inward if you're in question and really trust that intuitive voice. Yeah, I love that. And turning inward. I think like getting you demonstrated like by doing that, there's treasure. There is amazing stuff to come out of that and to find that space and to have a life where you get to create. And I think life in itself is a beautiful big game where we just kind of create and, you know, it's always say if you don't like it, change the rules to the best of your ability because there's definitely rules we can change around the side of things. But it is just like working it. So I love that is dreaming big, don't be afraid of failure and go within if you can. Well, what beautiful lessons that you have and what a beautiful way to kind of sum that up for people because I think they're massive at a point because people are, they're afraid of those three particular things. And I think if we, it is hard, how do we, how do we encourage people to do those particular things? But I suppose would you say that you kind of have to be ready or maybe there has to be, what's the word, an influence to help you push to go that way? Well, I think again, it's a practice. I think that you start small. You know, you don't have to completely change your life and blow it up the way that I have at times. You know. (laughing) It's like, you guys don't follow my, I didn't write the instruction book on this. Don't follow me. That's not my manual. Maybe you should publish that one. That'll be best slide. But I encourage you to make small changes first because it is, it is a habit. It is a practice. And the more the smaller ones lead to the medium sized ones that lead to the bigger ones, or unless you're foolish like me, you make big ones right away and just deal with the aftermath. Either way, but I would, I would, you know, I think, you know, measured for somebody who's maybe a little more risk adverse 'cause that's really what we're talking about here and change his risk aversion. - Yeah. - That if you're a little more risk averse, start small and build the muscle. And that just, you know, that's a really fancy word for our listeners. This means you just don't like change. Okay, if you're risk adverse, (laughs) you're a person who's afraid of change. That's just that way. 'Cause like, I'm like, wow, we got really technical. There we have a little bit of announcement. No, no, no. It's just like, but it is, it's true though. I think 100% it is starting small. It can be simple things. And what would be a tip you could give people who might be a little bit risk adverse, but just to start small? How would you, what suggestions would you make there? - Well, it really depends on what it is that they want to change in their life, right? You know, what is it that you want to, what is it that you want to change? Because while I can say, I went through all of these career path changes, you know, maybe that's somebody who is needing to move out of a relationship and get out of a relationship or maybe it's somebody who's, you know, wanting to move out of a job that they don't necessarily like. So I think the advice would really be different depending on what it is that they're going to do. But again, I think it really is to summon the courage to take the first step in whatever that is for you. If it is getting out of a relationship that isn't working for you, maybe it's seeing a therapist to see if, to figure out if this is something that you do want to do. Because I think you have to be really clear. That's the first step is getting really clear. - Clarity helps, but I was gonna say like, and I love the fact that sometimes the simplest of things is for me, especially this year was, I was like, no, I was like, I'm gonna say yes to things because it's just, I've gotta say yes to. - Oh, that's good. - I've just gotta say, and I just looked at it simply, it's like, I've just gotta say yes to opportunity. I wanted to say yes to expansion. I wanted to say yes to growth. I wanted to say yes. And like, I'm super thankful because if I didn't, I wouldn't have met you. I wouldn't even have the privilege of- - That's a better chip than mine last one. (laughing) That's a better chip than Ghost in a Therapist. But you know what's funny about that, Peter? - Yeah. - This is my year of saying no. - Oh, okay, all right. Well, take a set with that one. What's, where's the, I love this. What's, where's the- - Because I have this tendency to be a yes person, even if I don't feel like doing it. Or I tend to over with like all the pots boiling on the stove, have too many pots boiling on the stove, 'cause I said yes to too many people. And so then some things are starting to boil over. And so I've had to learn to say, nope, not taken that pot on, or no, I don't feel like doing that. Which for me, being a yes and person always has been really big to say no, as a complete sentence. - I love that one. There was, I always remember that from Serena Williams' biography. So it's like, no, no is a full sentence. - Yeah. - It is powerful. It is powerful. So there you go. What a beautiful way. And I just want to say, I'm so thankful that I caught you before your no year kicked in. And we got to have this interview. - No, you know, I'm gonna say it right now. No, you actually did, it was this year, 2023 was the no year. - Oh, was this year? - You did believe it. - It was this year. But you were- - As I say, office is attracts on the yes, you're the no this year, isn't it? - Yeah, but you're somebody I wanted to say yes to. - Okay, well, that's nice to know. - No, that's beautiful. But I absolutely, and what a beautiful way. Like honestly, Nick, it's always a pleasure. Honestly, we always have, I love having a chat with you. It's been so absolutely inspiring to listen to your story. And I'm so thankful you got to share your insights and your lessons and your takeaways for this one. I hope it'll be able to see this. And I know they'll enjoy it. But again, thank you so much for your time and your vulnerability because it is so lovely to talk to someone who has been through something like that and is willing to share that. And I think it is absolutely inspiring. So thank you again for your time. - Thank you, Peter. Thank you so much for having me. (upbeat music)
